Wishful Thinking

AT THE BEGINNING OF THE NEW 2017 YEAR WE ESCAPED TO THE FAMOUS ISLAND OF GODS. BEING TIRED OUT OF COLD, DARK AND GREY WINTERTIME IN RUSSIA, WE DIPPED INTO THE UNIQUE ATMOSPHERE OF BALI.
I WAS AFRAID TO FIND THIS PLACE TOO TOURISTIC AND OVERCROWDED, MOSTLY BECAUSE I WANTED TO SHOOT SOMETHING SPECIAL. 2016 WAS A HARD YEAR OF SELF-DETERMINATION. I’VE LOST A FIBRE OF MY ART AND DIDN’T KNOW WHERE TO MOVE OR HOW SHOULD I ACT IN A VISUAL WAY. I FOUND MYSELF IN A VICIOUS CIRCLE -I WANTED TO START CREATING SOMETHING NEW, BUT WAS CONFUSED BY NECESSITY OF”INVENTING” MY VISION. MY MIND TOOK ME AWAY FROM MY FEELINGS AND INTUITION. 
SINCE THAT I HAD NO PLEASURE TO SHOOT AND DIDN’T KNOW HOW TO DO THAT, BECAUSE EVEN THINGS IN WHICH I WAS ABSOLUTELY SURE DIDN’T WORK OUT. A CARAVAN OF MISFORTUNE – LIKE I WAS DAD-BLAMED.  THAT’S WHY I NEEDED TO CHANGE AN ATMOSPHERE AND A PLACE.
 BUT I WAS CRUELLY TAUGHT BY SOME FORCES AND CIRCUMSTANCES THAT THERE’S NOTHING MORE IMPORTANT THEN YOUR LIFE. ANY FAVORITE JOB OR HOBBY CAN ONLY EXIST THOUGHT THE BLESSING OF LIFE, GOD OR UNIVERSE. BUT I HAD THE OPPOSITE THOUGHTS BEFORE – I SAW NOTHING MORE ESSENTIAL THEN PHOTOGRAPHY AND THE RESULT. AFTER PRACTICING IN SEEING A BEAUTY AND IMPORTANCE IN EACH TINY MOMENT OR DETAIL AROUND, MY LEADING VOICE STARTED TALKING AGAIN. AND I WAS REALLY SURPRISED TO FIND IT VERY WELL-KNOWN. I BEGAN EXPLORING MY NATURE AGAIN, BUT GOING DEEPER. WITH NO FEAR TO BE JUDGED OR MISUNDERSTOOD. I CAPTURED WHATEVER I LIKED, WHATEVER CAUGHT MY EYE OR JUST SOMETHING I WANTED TO REMEMBER, COLLECTING THOSE VISUAL IMPULSES TO REPRESENT MY PERSONALITY AND EMOTIONS. 
I’M VERY GRATEFUL FOR THAT OPPORTUNITY AND SO GLAD THAT THIS MONTH GAVE ME A CHANCE TO FEEL A TRUE LOVE OF THE PROCESS.
AND BROUGHT ME BACK TO THE PATH.